I got Catfished!

Online dating should be pretty easy and straightforward, right?  It’s become so popular that there’s a lot of “normal” people on there… or so I thought!

I was messaged by this incredibly handsome and fit guy named Mike.  I nicknamed him “Magic Mike” as you can see why.

Yummy!  Nice smile, totally buff, seems nice…so he asks me for my phone number… says he’s moving from NY to Miami and has been trying to get to know people before his move.  I’m like “YESSSSS! How the hell did I get so lucky?!  Too good to be true!”  (Yep, that’s right, little voice of reason.)  

So after a day or two of texting, which involved heavy flirting and the delicious sense that I was gonna get me some of those rippling abs in the very near future – I started feeling that something was “off.”  (Grrr!)

First, his grammar was awful. (I associated this with the lack of brains due to his beauty.  You cannot be gifted on both sides!)  Then, while he claimed was all open to talking on the phone or FaceTiming, he would disappear or give an excuse when I asked to do so. And, finally, he was vague when answering questions on his plans for Miami upon arrival.  Seemed strange that someone making such a move would be so disorganized about the whole thing.

We’d chat about taking pictures/selfies and he sent me this picture.

He said he was working out one evening and so he sent this picture.  (Shit!  His abs have abs!)

While I planned my future escapades with this fine specimen, I was doing my internet research. I checked online for the logo of the gym he was at. Couldn’t find anything in New York.  I searched his phone number. Nada.  I started to do the reverse image search but couldn’t get it to work on my cell phone.  So after boasting about Magic Mike’s beauty to my inner circle of family and friends… my brother calls me laughing hysterically!  His boyfriend actually follows this guy on Instagram! Yep!  Magic Mike is actually Mike Thurston, fitness trainer/Insta model in LONDON!  (Check him out on FB: https://www.facebook.com/mikethurstonofficial or Instagram: http://instagram.com/mikethurston)

I was communicating with an imposter that was using this man’s images!  Thank goodness luck was on my side and my brother in law knew who this guy was!  Now it was time for me to flip the script on the Catfisher!  Catfishee became the catfisher!

What did I do?  Over the next few days I kept flirting with him and started getting really really needy.  Like, weird needy.  Then I started asking him for money.  Saying I was a single mom that needed the help.  He was freaking out!  Finally, I told him that I needed the money for my “final surgery” because I was in the midst of transitioning from a man to a woman.

(*Disclaimer: I have no problems with transgendered community but I knew it’d freak him out.)

I told him that the pics I posted from Match were of a friend of mine and that I hoped he’d forgive me for the lie.  He responded with “Ahhh! I am NOT interested, bye.  Thanks for posting fake pictures of yourself.”  Dude had the nerve to get pissy for faking him out! LOL!  My final message to him (before I finally blocked him) was a screen shot of Mike Thurston’s facebook page.  I told him that if I was ever in London, I’d be sure to look him up!  (I wanted him to know I was on to his game.)

With a bit more research, we traced the phone number to some loser that lives in Kissimmee, FL with a last name of Patel.  Very far off from Mr. Thurston.  There’s an address associated with this guy so I’m going to send him a very special gift…Glitter!

For those of you that haven’t seen “Ship Your Enemies Glitter“, check it out!  It’s soooo worth the $10! 

Moral of the story?  Trust your gut instinct.  If it’s too good to be true, it usually is!  And research the heck out of anyone you meet (online or in person).  And if you get catfished, don’t be a victim!  Fire back anyway you can!  I ended up having such a laugh with this experience!

And at least Mike Thurston has a new follower on social media!  Maybe a few after this post! 😉

Friday Night Fun – Movies & Dancing

Last Friday, I went to the movies and then out dancing.  It was a fun night, chill, nothing crazy.

I went with several girlfriends to see “Fifty Shades of Grey” which felt like it an adventure!  The movie was fine (I’m not a huge fan of who they picked as Christian Grey) but the most fun about the experience was watching it with a bunch of women that read the book.  People were cheering and “oohing” and “ahhing” at certain scenes or quotes… and the movie was much funnier than I expected!  Overall, it was worth seeing but I think I saw waaaaay too much of Dakota Johnson’s nipples (and the infamous bush, of course). LOL!

I met up with another set of friends for our regular Friday night dancing outing and… I’m over it.  I had fun but I’m tired of our regular place.  I feel like I know the DJ’s set and am about to ask him if I can fill in for him to damn switch it up!  Plus, no cute guys.  You would think, statistically speaking, this would be a great night to pick up some single honies the night before Valentine’s but it seems that only the annoying, unattractive ones followed that line of thought!

Overall, fun night but nothing worth making a big deal about.  So, it’s time to switch it up this coming weekend…

Online Dating

Yikes.  I am actually admitting that I’m going to try online dating.

I was one of those people who swore that I would never date anyone online.  That it was for older folks that didn’t have opportunities to go out and meet others at bars, etc.  Or for those that were lame and socially impaired.  Fast forward thirteen years… I’m that lame person.  (Dating has changed SO much since I last was single!)  But I’m now finding that online dating is now very socially acceptable but it’s also very convenient!

I am not looking for love online.  I do not want a relationship.  I’m too damaged at this point and my life is too complicated.  But I’m looking for superficial distractions.  People to make me feel attractive and wanted.  (I’m actually pretty embarrassed to admit this.)  It’d be nice to go out on some casual dates and get to know some new people.

This is where I now reach out to you all and sincerely would like to know if you have any experience online dating.  I’d love tips, suggestions… anything you’d like to share.  Is a Match profile worth the monthly fee?  (I really didn’t find anyone I was “wow” over while I was looking.)  Tinder?  (I’m a bit worried about meeting creepazoids.)  Any other sites you like?

Thanks for helping a sista out! 😉

Today’s Mantra:  Open yourself to new things.  And work on those selfies!

Friday Night Fun – Bar Hopping

Friday nights are my nights!  Grayheart stays with the kids and I go out with my girlfriends.

This past Friday I went bar hopping with my friend, Jazz.  We hit 5 different bars/restaurants in three different parts of town!  (It’s becoming sport for me these days, it seems.)  We ended up at the same club we’ve been going out to for the last month!  It’s nice to have that spot you can just go back to for dancing and laughs but it’s starting to get old real quick.

We danced and came across a whole bunch of characters there.  (What is up with Miami?! There seem to be no men I like!)  I really don’t mean to sound like a snob but I have not found anyone I’m attracted to!  I know I’m not going to find Mr. Perfect at a bar or club but, damn, can I get a hot guy somewhere?

Y’all know I love to dance.  I’ll shake, shimmy, twerk, flip it and reverse it, salsa, wind up… you name it.  But I don’t often like to dance with others.  I like to dance with my girlfriends.  I don’t want to be grinded up on.  My body, my space.  And I hate being thrown off rhythm by guys that just can’t dance.  (You cannot slow dance to Usher’s latest song.  Just no.)   So I was kind of being a biznitch by not accepting requests to dance.  (No, I will not dance with you for the fricking twentieth time!)   And I nicely stepped away from those that were trying to get too close.  (Does a face palm count as kind?)  I was losing my patience with the crowd.

Then, all of a sudden… guess who popped in?  The only guy I’ve thought was attractive and sexy and had swagger in all these nights I’ve gone out!  Whisky!  He said hello, gave me a kiss on the cheek, commented he saw me walking by his bar earlier this evening, gave me an appreciative once over and then he continued on with his buds to get drinks.  I danced and then was going to two step my way near him only to then have some hoochie mama swoop right in and latch onto him!  She was not cute but, man, was she ALL over him!  Grinding, going up and down, pressing on him… basically, she was going to give him anything he wanted that night.  He looked over a few times while I danced but I was NOT going to chase him.  It did piss me off, though.  I was hoping this would be my opportunity to have a distraction from my complicated life.  I won’t chase a man so I left shortly thereafter and did not say goodbye.

What did I get out of the night?  Well, I ate too many fried appetizers, had a bad glass of wine and then proceeded to have a stomach ache. Oh and the feeling of being kinda dissed by that punk, Whisky.  (I guess I deserved it considering I was not Ms. Congeniality there.)

Then I got home only to find Grayheart still awake.  I forgot he thought I went on a date!  I’d worn a dress with a belt and had taken the belt off in the car since it was bothering me on my drive home.  He didn’t say anything but I know he noticed the missing accessory.  Not sure why he was up at 2:30 am but he was on the computer.  Ain’t nobody got time for that so I showered and went to bed.

Pretty uneventful night.  This is what single life is going to be like?  Lawd, help me!

Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Award

I’m so thrilled to have been nominated for a blog award by “Not Another Tall Blog.”  It’s an honor because Angie’s blog rocks and is full of fun stories of her as an expat living in Britian, thoughts on music. life as someone tall as well as other fun stuff.  Please check her out!

So this award thing… Here are the rules.

Here are the five rules to follow:

1. Thank the blogger who nominated you, linking back to their site.

2. Put the Award logo on your blog.

3. Answer the ten questions sent to you.

4. Make up ten new questions for your nominees to answer.

5. Nominate seven blogs.

Here are my answers to Not Another Tall Blog’s questions

1. How long have you been blogging for?  Since December 2014

2. As trivial as this may sound, why do you blog?  It’s become my outlet during my divorce process. I’ve found a ton of fun blogs to read and really wonderful people to interact with!

3. Is there anything in particular that you would like to achieve with your blog?  It’s more for me than anything else. It’ll be my diary to look back on as I continue my healing process.

4. Do you “do” blogger awards? If yes, what do they mean to you? If not, why not?  I’m pretty new to the blogosphere so blogger awards are a new concept for me.  It was such a pleasant surprise to be nominated! 

5. Is there anything that your followers don’t know about you, which you would really like them to know?  Nothing more at this moment. But eventually I think my blog will evolve to include more about me and less about my divorce.

6. What does the “sisterhood” cause mean to you?  Women taking care of women!

7. Can you share with other bloggers a good practice that works well for you (e.g., a “tip”)?  Get involved in the online courses that WordPress offers. They really help.

8. Is there anything that you are particularly proud of as a blogger?  I’m proud that I actually became a blogger.  I am a terrible procrastinator but I pushed that aside and did it!

9. Do you tend to read other blogs, or do you prefer to concentrate just on maintaining yours?  I love reading other blogs! There are wonderful writers and interesting stories out there!

10. Does blogging require any sacrifices from you? Just time. Otherwise, nope!

And here are the blogs I’ve nominated for the Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Award:

1. When Doves Fall –  Recently divorced, has great wit and just fun to read. Love her bite!

2. Becky Due – Such a positive and empowering site! Great author!

3. Tiny Kelsie – She’s young, smart, a mother, amazingly triumphant, recently re-wed, runner, triathlete… she rocks!

4. Darwin on the Rocks and Around the World –  Photography and travel and she’s just so real! The minute I first clicked on her site, I was blown away.

5. Infinite Satori – Serious case of wanderlust. Amazing travels and photography.

6. Skinny and Single – I laugh so hard when I read her posts. Sarcasm and right on observations!

7. Lessons from the End of a Marriage – Intelligent, inspiring, thoughtful… She has an incredible story and does a great job sharing what she’s learned from it.

My Questions for the Nominated Seven Bloggers:

1. Will you give me a brief synopsis about your blog?

2. What do you do outside of blogging (without divulging anything too private, of course)?

3. When did you start blogging?

4. Why do you blog?

5. How often do you post and why?

6. Do your friends and family know you blog?

7. How do you feel about posting personal pictures and info on yourself?

8. Do you have more than one blog? If so, please share.

9. What part of the world do you live in?

10. What kind of music are you into?

That’s all, folks!  Angie, thanks for the award!  And thank you guys for participating!

Night Out – Baby Steps

Friday night I went out with Jazz and Cat and my other cousin, Daisy.  It was Daisy’s husband’s birthday.  We went to a wine bar and then out dancing.  (I’ve graduated, y’all, from crying each time I go out!)  A large group of their friends went out that night and, of course, there was a cutie there… Timberland.  Tall, cute and smart.  He made his interest known and didn’t leave my side once we made it to the club that night.

I danced the night away and he was incredibly polite and sweet. Offered me anything I needed and was respectful of my space.  But there was no magnetic pull.  Had I drank that night, I probably would’ve been more “open” but I just wasn’t feeling it.  I’m not looking for a relationship but I certainly don’t want to waste my first kiss post-separation on someone my gauge reads “lukewarm” about.  Handsome or not, chemistry is something you can’t force.

After dancing, we all went to Denny’s for breakfast and had a fabulous time talking and laughing.  (He ate some of my pancakes, which strangely felt intimate.)  Once we headed back to our cars, I bolted.  I didn’t want him to ask me for my phone number.  I just don’t need the distraction right now.  I went home knowing that I had a great night and really enjoyed the attention from another man but that I’m not ready for anything more than that.  Baby steps…

Friday Night Fun

Friday nights are my nights “off” from the kids.  My cousin (Cat), a bud of hers (Jazz) and I headed out last night for dinner and drinks.  Little did I know Cat was in the mood for a late night!  After dinner, we headed over for drinks at a few spots and then out to a bar/club.  The place had live music and instantly got us in the mood!  We danced our tails off to fun music and felt like a college student again.

There was a cute boy… I say boy because I’m certain he was in his damn mid-twenties.  I gave basically every guy the stiff arm that evening because I was enjoying girls’ night out and there just wasn’t anyone that caught my attention.  But then towards the end of the night, “HELLO!” Mr. Cutie Patootie with eyes that twinkled and a smile that could land a Colgate commercial.  (You know, dimples, perfect teeth, lovely lips…Sigh, I digress.)  He kept staring with his buds but I was too busy ignoring him and dancing like it was my night.  We left the bar and – following the lead of the Selfie Generation – the girls and I began to take pictures in front of the place with our phones.  Well, guess who all of a sudden popped up to photobomb us?  Dude with the megawatt smile and his two unimportant not cute buddies. YUP!  But instead of a photobomb, he’s actually part of the picture.

You know those people that shake your hand and look you straight in your eyes when they ask you your name?  Yeah, he did that.  And not only did he do that but he repeated my name to me while still giving me that dazzling smile.  (Swoon!)  Casual chat goes on and we come to find out that he’s a local bartender (of course he is with his looks) and he lived right in the area.  I then took it upon myself to play hard to get and announced I had to get going but that we’d be back in the near future.  I figured he’d either be bold enough to ask for the digits or would be too much of a wuss to risk rejection in front of his buds and strangers.  He wussed out.  Which is fine for whatever reason he decided but it didn’t matter.  He did for me what I needed.  Made me feel giddy after a long time of feeling shitty.  Anyway, he grabbed my hand to shake it good bye and did that stare through your soul thing again with a smooth “Bye, Athena.”  (Double swoon!)  Guy played it good.  He remembered each of our names and made us feel some typa way!  He must be a professional.  I will nickname him Whisky since he’s a bartender and 25 year aged whisky is glorious and rare. 😉

New Year’s Eve Recap

Happy New Year y’all!

So here was my night:

Grayheart stayed with the kids and I just made sure I had my cry of the night in the car before I put on makeup and picked up my friends! (Made for a much more manageable evening.)

We went to South Beach and partied at the beautiful Mondrian (hotel) which overlooks Biscayne Bay. I wish I had taken pictures but check out their site if you want to see more http://www.morganshotelgroup.com/mondrian/mondrian-south-beach. The place is gorgeously decorated and situated in a great part of the beach.

At first I was not going to drink but since it was open bar and the girls kept passing me glasses of champagne, well, I couldn’t resist. And I’m glad I did because it loosened me up!

At midnight, my sister was my new year’s kiss and hug. Perfect person to share the special moment with as she’s been my rock throughout all this.  (Although there were a few LAME guys walking around asking if we had our kissing partner for midnight. Ummm, no, dude. I don’t need to make out with anyone just to say I did.)

My sis, though, found herself a hottie bearded fellow that chatted her up. His buddy then started chatting me up (mind you, these guys are 25 yrs old) and as I turn to look for my sis, she’s making out with her guy.  So I was like “Good for her. I’m glad somebody is getting some action!” Which then prompted the buddy to so generously offer a kiss if I wanted one. I think he mistook my comment for wishful thinking.  Lol!  So then of course the words came tumbling out of my mouth (yeah, super cool girl I am) that no way, I was going through a divorce and just didn’t have it in me. The guy felt insta bad and gave me a consolation hug.  He was adorable and sweet.  But no.  So, I was the lame one after the long night. 😉

Night ended after we determined we had too much bubbly and needed to be able to pass out immediately.  We made it home safely this morning and here I am now writing about it while nursing a headache.

I still felt a bit out of place but I did better than my last night out so there’s hope for me!  The picture I’ve included in this post is of some of the girls overlooking the bay with our silly NYE headpieces. We didn’t know we were being photographed.

Hope your evening was fun! I look forward to hearing what everyone else did.

2014 Vision Board

As a good-bye to the year, I thought I’d share my 2014 vision board with you all. 🙂

In January (after Grayheart and I initially discussed separation but decided not to pursue), I struggled with trying to find who I was outside of being a mom.  I read that putting together a plan with images could really help visualize and actualize a new life.  My girlfriend had a “vision board” party and we cut through magazines and advertisements to produce something that described us.

I placed my board on my nightstand and looked at it on a daily basis.  I told myself I’d start running and eventually do a half marathon, lose 25 lbs, sleep and read more, eat better, take up painting again, possibly archery, etc., etc.  I haven’t completed everything on it but I certainly have achieved much more than I thought I would.

Some of these will be placed again on my 2015 Vision Board while new goals accompany them.  I’ve really found it to be a motivational project and look forward to creating a new one.

I wish you all a very safe and happy New Year!  Here’s to hoping that 2015 will bring us all great things!  (Or that you go after those great things you want.  Why wait for it to come to us, right?)

Esta frase es una cajita de paz llena de alegría, envuelta con cariño, sellada con una sonrisa y enviada con un beso. ¡Feliz año nuevo!