February Blues

Since Valentine’s Day weekend, I have been a bit of a mess.  I hit that inevitable setback and really was very sad for sometime.  (Functional but in a crabby way.)

Grayheart finally found a townhouse that has rooms for each of our kids.  His lease started middle of this month and he’s slowly moving in.  (He’s been traveling the last two weeks for work.)  I think the reality of my kids having a second home to spend time in really just screwed with me.  Coping with that thought has been tough.  We haven’t implemented it yet but that storm is coming soon.  (Prepare yourselves, readers. You’ll probably not like me when I first adjust to the change.)

He also confirmed that he’s seeing Raggedy.  And that she would be visiting him while out of town this coming weekend because it is her birthday. (Bitch.)  I have worked so hard at ridding of my anger but I felt it slowly creeping back.  It just pisses me off that he gets to find love and happiness during this process.  He doesn’t deserve it and I wish them nothing but the worst.  I sound so petty but I hate them (together as a couple).  She lives my life, doing things “we” used to do while I sleep at home alone at night nursing my broken heart (or hangover).

I’m not going to let this confirmation have control over me.  So while a shitty couple of weeks made landfall in February, thankfully, this week has been better.

The Week’s Mantra:  Feel the feels. Get through it.  And, March, hurry up already!

Crappy weekend & Lice

After my revelation that I had been doing so well and felt great and blah, blah, blah… I had a major setback this past weekend.

Grayheart is working crazy hours, he’s now traveling for work, Valentine’s Day, I’m sick, I’ve eaten terribly, the kids have been out of control and then my little She-ra got LICE!   I literally broke down crying on the floor of my closet.  I actually was so stressed that I screamed at my kids one night and just sent them straight to bed.  (I felt like an awful mother!)  I just could not take it anymore.

By the way, for anyone that has not experienced the joys of lice… it is the MOST tedious and annoying thing to go through!  These invaders multiply at a rapid pace and will drive anyone remotely OCD or Type A crazy!  I have washed, heated, dried, washed again, thrown out, shaken out every and anything in my house that my daughter has come across.  And then you can’t help but feel itchy just talking about it!

So I’m chalking this weekend and last few days up to just a momentarily case of the blues and bad luck.  Let’s hope the cold weather about to hit Miami will take away the shitty fortune I’ve had and bring in some good!